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Navigating the First Holiday Season After Losing a Loved One

  • Writer: Sette Therapy
    Sette Therapy
  • Dec 12, 2025
  • 2 min read

The first holiday season without someone you love often brings a unique kind of emotional weight. Holidays highlight togetherness, tradition, and memory. When a loved one is missing, the season can feel disorienting. Many people notice that grief shows up in waves. Some moments feel manageable while others stir sadness, longing, or anger. These responses are natural. Grief is not a single feeling. It is a complex emotional landscape, especially during a time that once felt familiar.


Allowing Yourself to Feel What You Feel

Many people pressure themselves to push through the season with a sense of cheer. This can create emotional strain. Your experience may not match the tone of the world around you. It is healthy to allow room for your emotions. Grief may show up as sadness, exhaustion, irritability, or numbness. These reactions do not mean you are failing to cope. They reflect the depth of your relationship and the significance of your loss.


Adjusting Traditions and Expectations

Traditions can bring comfort, but they can also intensify grief. You may choose to keep some rituals, modify others, or create new ones entirely. There is no correct way to honor this season. You might light a candle, prepare your loved one’s favorite dish, or set aside quiet moments to remember them. You may also choose to simplify your plans by limiting travel or declining invitations that feel overwhelming. Giving yourself permission to adjust expectations can ease emotional pressure.


Finding Support in Your Community

Grief often feels isolating, yet many people carry similar experiences. Sharing your feelings with trusted friends or family can provide relief. Some people benefit from support groups, where others understand the complexities of grieving during the holidays. Talking with a therapist can also help you navigate guilt, sadness, and shifting identity during this time. You do not need to hold the season alone.


Honoring Your Loved One While Caring for Yourself

Honoring someone you love does not require grand gestures. Small acts of remembrance can be meaningful. You might write a letter, visit a special place, or simply speak their name. Caring for yourself is also a form of honoring your connection. Resting, setting boundaries, and giving yourself compassion help you move through the season with steadiness.


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online therapy for millennial anxiety and dread

Vanessa Setteducato, LMFT

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist #119184

Los Angeles, California

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